Winter beer choices.

Ahhhh, we have all been there gentlemen, and lets face it....it's inevitable. I could blow smoke up your ass and tell you to drink moderately, and turn down that shot of Jameson. However; we all know that isn't going to happen, so lets talk about what we should be getting obliterated drinking this time of year instead. Obviously Sam Winter is always a fantastic treat, and it only comes around but once a year so don't miss it. A dark wheat Lager brewed with winter spices.....salivate. Ok, ok, we all know how I feel about Sam Adams products. Another teriffic winter beer is a good Whiskey Porter, youve seen em, but have you tried them? They are always around, if your in my neck of the woods Brown in Troy has a fabulous home brewed Whickey Porter, that will also know your sock off. O.K, now well say you have tried a Whiskey Porter, and you have enjoyed it..obviouisly! Now I want you to have your bar-tender make you a black and tan (Guiness) with your favorite Whiskey Porter. Ecxtesey ensuse. The Sweetness from the Whiskey (or bourbon if necessarey) combined with the richness of the Guiness is a Winter treat that would warm the heart of Scrooge himself. One other tip, for you novice drinkers out there: Is your bartender doing your black and tan combo justice? I'll give you a tip. A well made black and tan alwayts looks like there is more tan than black, proportionally. This is because a Guiness glass carries more fluid in the top half than the bottom. this means if your Black and tan was eye balled to a 50/50 ration there is probably too much black and not enough tan.

As my friend from Dos Equis says: "Stay thirst my friends." A terrible beer, but a hilarious ad campaign!

The Book of Eli

It's only once in a great while that a film comes along, so compelling and wonderfully complex and discrete in its story telling that it has you thinking about it and pondering it's possible messages for days on end. When that does happen, it is oh so sweet, and the Book of Eli is just this kind of fantastic movie making. I could shower the Book of Eli with accolades for several hours on end, and never truly do it justice. Part of what made me so pleasantly surprised at this movie was how it was marketed. Upon seeing the previews to this film one would have imagined that it was going to be a fun, yet run of the mill post-apocalyptic action movie. Much to my surprise The Book of Eli is anything but run of the mill. This is movie making at it's best. A more thoughtful, and though provoking story telling you will not find, and it's because of one of holly woods lost arts. The art of subtlety! Making people think about the story, and it's messages. We have gotten to a point, sadly, where every message in a movie has to be concrete and heavy handed, lost is the wonderful subtle style of The Book of Eli. Much like some of the greatest Russian Literature of our time like "Crime and Punishment," Sometimes themes are better off when they meant to be pondered and examaned, rather than concrete black and white themes like movies such as "Crash," which is about as subtle as a swift kick in the nuts. It's hard for me to go too in-depth with the plot and not destroy the experience for you, and it is an experience. Denzel Washington, and Gary Oldman deliver powerhouse performances, as per their usual. In a film that is character, and idea driven these two actors were perfect for these roles. roles that are so much larger than you can imagine, or that first meets the eye, but you'll be pondering these characters for a week after you see the film. I won't go any further talking about Eli, because I want people to see this masterpiece with fresh eyes that haven't already been tainted by short sighted reviewers. I will say this, see this movie, and be preppared for great film, not a mindless action picture.

Rating: six and a half out of seven stars.

Disaster in Haiti. John Cusack to lead survivors to career suicide.

No one hates a tragic natural disaster like I do, but isn't U.S overdoing things with a 100 Million dollar donation? Last time I checked were broke right? If we have all this cash to burn, I should be getting another god dam stimulus check in the mail. Has Haiti ever even had 100 million dollars? I know this earthquake was tragic but aren't most of the building over there huts with straw tops? I know it sucks when someone knocks over your lincoln logs, but it doesn't take 100 mill to put them back together.

A quick word on recent Games!

I won't bother to mention Modern Warefare 2. It's a great game, and everyone knows it's a great game. I'm here to tell you about two games it would be a mistake to miss this year. Marvel Ultimate alliance II, and Wet. Both of these titles could go under the radar due to thier release at the same time as other, bigger releases. Wet is really a can't miss, despite it's inexplicable mediocre revies (7.5 on Gamespot) this styleistic action game is more than you could hope for in an action game. Wet is like playing a Quentin Tarantino movie, with a cool cheesey 70's action movie feel. Wet even feature funny intermission sequences like you were at the drive inns long ago watching a great B-rate action flick. Weather your sliceing someone in half with your sword, or sliding across a table with both barrels blazing, Wet is exhilirating action fun from start to finish.

Rating: Marvel Ultimate Alliance II: Four out of six stars. Wet: Five out of six stars.

Dragon's Age....um, hell yes!

If your anything like me, and if your a meat eating beer guzzling male, you are, then from time to time you utterly crave a good old fashioned role playing game, and Dragon's age provides that nectar that you are craving. These are utterly high accolades for a role player, because the past few years have been pretty plentiful with the great role players. Oblivion, and the Shivering Isles ad on were terrific, as was the more recent Fallout 3, and Mass Effect. That said Dragon's age delivers in a time when good role players have been churned out on a pretty regular basis, and it certainly hold it's own. Do you like a good story? If yes, your in luck, to say the least. DA delivers a great story, more story, and then a little more good story. You'll find yourself so wrapped up in the intriguing dialogue of DA that it seems more like a terrific interactive movie than a game, but thankfully those wonderful parts are follo0wed up by epic battles and lengthy quests, which will test your ability to utilize unique combinations of party members, and tactics. There are so many fascinating ways to approach a battle, and each battle is unique in what will best work to triumph. You may at times want archers and mages, but leave a rouge behind and you may find you cann'ot pick a certain lock or disarm a trap. You may also control if your parts rushes forward and attacks at will, or should they hold position and give you a chance to throw a few aarows before your tanks rush in and risk a quick death. The combat choices are incredibley interesting and keep the game fresh till the very end. There are also a myriad of ways to approach how you level up your team. There are so many different skills, and combat tactics to inprove, and each one has a drastic effect on what each of your party will excell at it, or what their weaknesses will be. Armor, weapons, shields, potions....oh my. There are a lot, and plenty of variations to each. You'll spend so much time with merchants outfitting your team that you'll say; "Makers Breath, how is it four in the morning?"

Overall: Four and a half stars out of six. If this game has a weakness it is probvably the graphics, which are a little weak, but not enough to make this anything other than a must play game in 2010. It does fall short of fallout 3, but in all fairnesss that is a role player that sets the bar so high, it's allmost impossible to touch it. In short; buy Draggon's Age. Play it, live it, love it, and don't make any plans for a while.

Championship weekend 2010

Alright, alright, it's been a while. Fear not faithful men and women, my wit and wisdom are back! First and foremost are our NFL title games. The most exciting weekend in sports every year, and 2010 is no different, infact these are two of the best match-ups in recent memory. The New York Football Jets will travel to Inianapolis to take on the Colts in a battle of wills. These are two of the most stubborn teams in football, as capsulized by their head coaches, Rex Ryan and Jim Caldwell respectively. You have to admire Rex Ryans commitment to hard nosed football, the Jets do not panic. They just keep playing defense and running, until someone finally makes a big play. Jim Caldwell also sticks to his guns, including his decision to rest starters down the regular season stretch, a decision that is now a mute point. They both stick to paying their style of football with unwavering passion, and this weekend should be no different. The Jets have a lot going for them in this game. The Colts run defense is horrendus, and noone runs better than the Jets and their powerful o-line. The real key to this game is if N.Y can survive the first ten minutes of this game. The Colts will no-doubt come out firing in front of their home crowd, and it will be crucial for N.Y to get through the first quarter with a low or zero score. If the Jets do this they will have a chance to wear out a bad run defense and keep the football away from Peyton Manning. More shots of Manning standing on the sidelines helpless in a Jets game, is exactly what Rex Ryan needs to ahppen. Defensively the Jets are one of few teams that stand of chance of confusing Peyton with their blizt schemes. Why can the Jets do this? A simple answer; "Revis Island." Darrell Revis can man cover any receiver in the league without help, and because of this the Jets can bring pressure and crowd the line of scrimmage at will. This is a more difficult task against a Clots team that spread the ball out, but N.Y only has to force Peyton into shorter throws and extra snaps to frushtrate and force Indianapolis into mistakes.

Pick: J...E....T....S Jets, Jets, Jets!!! Call me crazy if you want, but one thing never changes in the NFL. Come playoff time there are two things you want to be doing well; running the ball, and playing defense. The Jets are REALLY good at both of those things.


Vikings at Saints: Tough game to pick. The one seed, and the two seed go head to head in what should be an epic battle for the NFC title. For the Vikings it's as simple as it is for the Jets, they must run and keep Drew Brees away from the football, but unlike N.Y I'm not convinced the Brett Favres Vikings are patient enough to do the job. Adrian Peterson hasn't been on track in weeks, and should the run game start slowly it will be tempting for Minni to turn to their future hall of famer to try and keep up with the Saints, but this wil be a trap. The Vikings will not win a shoot-out with New Orleans they must not loose their patients. For the Vikings to have a chance they must keep feeding Peterson, and try to keep the game close unitll the Saints D starts to tire.

Pick: Who Dat? Thats right, pick Saints. Unlike Rex Ryan and the Jets iron will, I think the vikings will panic and find themselves in a hole early and often. Look for Darren Sharper to be a big hero Sunday against his old teammate Brett Favre.

Why do Pakistanis love water, but hate ice????

"DON'T FREEZE THAT WATER!!!"


Having worked in the restaurant business for a very, very long time. I have observed many funny quirks about different groups of people, but none quite as interesting as the love hate relationship between Pakistanis and H2O. Pakistanis will always order water as sure as they will not tip, but they always also insist that the water be served without ice. This is such a curious phenomenon to me, why do these people have such a grudge against water when it changes state? Do they also hate H2O when it breaks into gaseous form I wonder? I'm sure it isn't a cleanliness issue because the guests usually smell like a bums nut-sack to begin with. We certainly can't assume a hygiene concern when they are a typically smelly, and dirty people to begin with. What does this leave us with? Poor dental hygiene which causes teeth to ache when confronted with very cold materials....perhaps. More likely though is a simple propensity to be annoying, and cheap at the same time.

Cool stuff

"The Manningsmind.com website gives fans the chance to match wits with one of the fastest brains in football via an online experience called ManningsMind.com. The site lets fans test their NFL knowledge and the speed of that knowledge against Peyton Manning. Mano a mano. Armchair quarterback vs. champion quarterback. Every second counts as fans try to answer questions correctly and march their team down a futuristic field, complete with hologram players running across an illuminated game table. Manning is “alive” across the illuminated game table, jeering and interacting with opponents who dare to take him on.

Fans will go head-to-head with the fastest brain in football by answering trivia questions such as: “Jason Elam's 63-yarder tied who's career record? Tom Dempsey, Mark Moseley, Wade Tollison” If you don't answer in time you'll get responses back such as: “You're going to have to be faster than that,” followed with a written message saying: “Take on the fastest brain in football.” Other responses include for correct answers, “Not bad for a rookie, I'll be waiting for you,” or for a wrong response, “That would be right if it wasn't so wrong.” Other messaging included in textual form include, “As soon as he thinks it, you see it.”

The site will include a standings page, rules page and players can receive invitations to play.

href=" http://manningsmind.fromthefan.com/?L3503 ">

THATS IT!! I CAN'T TAKE ANYMORE

In the past I have been Rex Grossman's staunchest supporter. Through thick and thin, I defended what appeared to be a plucky and talented young quarterback. Despite the criticism, and despite what people told me, I defended Rex. Fellow Bears fans have gone so far as to label me a "Rex Grossman apologist." Insinuating that I was a better T-rex spin master than most white house press secretary. In all fairness Grossman hasn't always had things working in his favor, pass-protection breakdowns, lack of a consistent running game, and dropped passes. However; Sunday night against the Dallas Cowboys Wrecks Gross-Man made me eat all of words and then some. At one point in the game I felt bad for Grossman. It looked like the Bears took a reasonably talented athlete that had never played QB before in his life, and put him into the game. In short; Rex Grossman is a massive retard. Bad decisions, complete lack of vision, and a complete inability to correct any of it. The Chicago Bears cannot continue to let, what is a great football team, be lead by a man who just can't play a lick of quarterback. Even if Kyle Orton was the Bears starting QB they would be 3-0. Orton had a complete inability to make plays, but he also didn't hurt Chicago...time after time, after God Dam Time!!!! Rex Grossman is in fact God Awful. There it is on record for all time! It's time the squeaky wheel got the Brian Griese. There was a time that Rex had the unwavering support of his teammates, because he does have an innate ability to be likable, but that time has past. Those blind statements of support have gone by the waste side and instead of being a likable guy who may come out of his tail-spin, Grossman has grown into a complete joke. A man without a prayer. I once saw Rex as the spark-plug the Bears needed, now I know he is the one thing the Bears canno't afford. I still think there is a lot of talent hidden behind the youth and bad decision making, but his stay in Chi-town must come to an end. There is no way Grossman can overcome his complete lack of confidence, and support. I once had a good feeling about Grossman, but no one I blindly support ever pays me back, and it's time to eat Crow once again.

Bio-shock

WOW!!! Bio-shock for X-box 360 is positively insane! When it comes to chalenge, story, graphics, and fun look no further. This is one first peron shooter that could make Halo 3 seem like a let down. From it's unbelievably beauitful environments, to it's unique style of combat Bio-shhock challenges the player to find their own combination of powers and abilities to dispatch bad guys. Constantly altering your genetic code to gain a myriad of cool powers, from telekenises to weilding flame. Fighting in Bio-shock never gets stle. Also neat is the ability to research bad guys. Armed with camera you may photograph your foes and reveal their weaknesses, making ammo selection that much more important. I also like the ability to save your progress at any time durring the game, this makes Bio that much playable since a large block of time is not necessary to enjoy it. All in all this is some of the most innovative and fun gameing in recent memory. I'll report back a more detailed review, upon completion but for now buy this game!! Now, today!

3:10 to Yuma

I don't think I have ever been so disappointed in the last thirty minutes of a movie, as I was for this film. I literally put my head in my hands and asked "why" Why would they ruin such a great classic western? The first two hours of this movie are as exciting and entertaining as any in recent memory, it was just a classic western, with a classic western story...that's all we need. Audiences haven't seen a good western in decades, and this was perfect! The acting was phenomenal, with crowe and Bale giving life to old characters. Then it happens. I will not give away the movie, but I will simply say that one of the characters undergoes such a dramatic personality change that it's laughable. Not only was it laughable, but it was grossly unnecessary. This movie didn't need some half-assed attempt at the human condition, it needed a classic western finish. What we got was one of the biggest "almosts" I can remember.

Week 3 in the NFL!

Bills at Patriots: J.P "Lose man" is horrible, gone are the days when he even shows flashes of a bright future. Juron isn't smart enough to protect him with play calling, instead he is exposed and a decent defense and running game are overshadowed by boobery. I'm sure the Pats will lose a game eventually, but it's not going to be at home.

Pick team 007

Vikings at Chiefs: The Vikings have been playing some stout defense, although a half-conscious John Kitna managed to find holes. The Chiefs haven't shown us much of anything so far, but at home I expect Larry Johnson to be resurrected. The way the vikings are turning the ball over, K.C will have plenty of chances on their home turf.

Pick Chiefs

Lions at Eagles: Now this is an interesting match-up. What are the odds of Philly going 0-3 after such an impressive campaign last year with Jeff Garcia....pretty good. Jeff Garcia is gone now, leaving only McNabb to throw passes at peoples feet. Donovan is so inaccurate and erratic it's ridiculous, his completion percentage is high due to the 60-70 swing passes per game to Brian Westbrook, but don't let that fool you. The Lions are playing pretty well, and they certainly have their rally caps on, but but a trip into Philadelphia where the Eagles have their backs up against the wall may be a bit too much for Detroit.

Pick Eagles

49er's at Steelers: It's going to be hard to pick against the Steelers at home this year. "Big" Ben is playing some great football, and so is "fast" Willie Parker, and the always reliable Hines Ward. The Steelers D has been excellent, but I am waiting to see them against real competition. Frank Gore ran wild against the Rams but he won't find so much bad tackling against the Pittsburgh front seven. Alex Smith still hasn't shown me that he can consistently make throws, making this an easy pick.

Pick Steelers

Rams at Buccaneers: St. Louis has to be one of the biggest disappointments of 07 so far. Their defense has been "fair" but their star studded offense has done less than nothing. Bulger and Steven Jackson need to get on the ball, and fast before Seattle and San Fran have a four game lead. The Buc's launched an areal assault against the Saints, but in all fairness the Saints are still reeling from Hurricane Katrina, and various other disasters that happened a really long time ago. As long as Garcia stays sharp, I don't see the Buc's getting beat at home. They still enough good defenders to keep the Rams in check.

Pick Tampa

Dolphins at Jets: Trent Green was God awful against Dallas last week, and they were in that game at the half. Too many defensive breakdowns, and offensive blunders at home. I expect the fins to get badly out-coached again this week, against a Jets team that is fighting a pretty hard schedule. N.Y was impressive last week in their almost comeback against Baltimore, making great adjustments at the half to stop their QB from getting the beating of his life. If not for stone hands Mcarrins, the Jets would have brought the Ravens to O.T

Pick Jets

Colts at Texans: Houston is giving us quite a surprise so far, their offense is humming and the defense has been adequate. Peyton Manning and the Colts were tested last week against the Titans, but that's just the magic of Jeff Fischer and his ability to build a game-plan for anyone. I don't see Houston doing as good a job of containing the Colts, and with Andre Johnson hurting they won't keep up either.

Pick Colts

Chargers at Packers: Norv Turner has certainly put his stamp on the Chargers, after a 13-3 campaign a year ago San Diego (which means a whales vagina) cleaned out it's coaching staff...? What? Doesn't make a lot of sense, but you have the result of what I like to call "if it ain't broke, don't fix it." Green Bay has been playing well on both sides of the ball, and when the Packers start to believe in themselves with Brett Favre as the QB things could get dangerous.

Pick Green Bay

Cardinals at Ravens: Baltimore survived a late threat by the Jets, and they had better find a way to posses the football a little more this week. On the bright side they should be able to dish out a good sound beating to Leinart. I don't see Arizona being able to pass protect adequately against the Ravens.

Pick Ravens

Bengals at Seahawks: The seahawks blundered in Arizona Cardinals style, and lost a game they should have easily won. Seattle has been terrible on the road, but fortunately they face a defenseless Bengals team at home.Also noteworthy; Chad Johnson isn't anywhere near as funny as Terell Owens.

Pick Seahawks

Browns at Raiders: I have been waiting all summer for this clash of the titans (subtle sarcasm). The Raiders typically play pretty solid defense, but if Cleveland can duplicate their areal masterpiece it will be a long day for the Raiders. Things really started to open up for Jamal Lewis also, which can make the Browns kinda scary. I'm not going to get too high on Cleveland because that Bengals defense is absolutely horrific, but they did keep it up for four quarters. The Raiders will have to not turn the ball over....may as well ask for it to rain cows.

pick Browns

Jaguars at Bronco's: Where are you Jaguars? Where is that run stuffing D, and power running game? I'm sure what is happening to Jacksonville, but Denver is a 2-0 team that could easily be 0-2. They will have a big test this week against a hungry Jaguars team. On the positive side Jay cutler has played really well, he isn't throwing 70 yard bombs, but he also isn't making the mistakes you expect from a young quarterback. Travis Henrey has been excellent, as he always has been. The Bronco D isn't as stout as it once was, but they still make the big stops, and at home that should do the trick. The Jaguars have got to show us something before they get any more consideration.

pick Bronco's

Giants at Redskins: I don't know about Joe Gibbs, far too often the Skins looked confused. Their time management isn't great, and they always look indecisive in critical moments. Offensively they are loaded with talent, and that should be enough this week. That Giants team is bad, bad, bad.

Pick Redskins

Panthers at Falcons: Joey Harrington is still the QB for Atlanta.

Pick Panthers

Cowboys at Bears: NFC super powers meet under the lights for Sunday night football. Dallas has been very impressive, and Romo has nothing short of spectacular but this week he will face a relentless pass-rush. Bears defense is undeniably the best in the NFL, and if Rex Grossman can somehow come out of his funk there will be many things to take advantage of. Dallas doesn't cover the pass very well, and Bernard Berrian should find himself wide open down field. Chicago is tough anywhere, but they are darn near unbeatable at home.

Pick Bears

Titans at Saints: The Titans didn't get a win for their efforts last week against the Colts, but they did gain some respect. The Saints have been hemorrhaging respect since the begging of the season, and if they keep getting drubbed they are going to be a laughing stock (will the paper bags return?) I never thought that the Saints had a very good defense, but it is their sputtering offense that has my eyebrows arched. Drew Brees, Bush, Mcalister, and Colston are good weapons. There is no reason why the Saints shouldn't be scoring some points. I don't expect the offensive slide to last very long.

Pick Saints Win one for Katrina victims!!!!

Pro-football week 2

Colts at titans: Indy is playing way too good right now, even for the up-start Titans. The Vince Young madden curse watch is on!

Pick Colts

Packers at Giants: This is an interesting macth-up. On one hand the Giants passing game looked really good in a Sunday night loss to Dallas. On the other hand Green Bay won an incredibly sloppy game versus the Eagles. If Eli is ready to go this should be one hec of a ball game, but something tells me that by years end N.Y will be little more than a bad punchline.

Pick Packers

Bengals at Browns: Reports of Cleveland's resurgence have been greatly exaggerated.
By report, I mean my own bad reports.

Pick Bengals

Texans at Panthers: It's back to earth time for Houston as they visit Carolina, and a red hot Jack Delhome. I fully expect that shoddy Houston O-line to rear it's ugly head against Peppers and Company. Matt Schaub should be in store for the beating of his life, and gain a little respect for his predecessor.

Pick Panthers

Saints at Buc's: Jeff Garcia and company will turn this game into a shoot-out, and it won't be an easy win for the Saints. I really like Drew Brees and Reggie Bush to rebound from their abysmal opening day performances. Have I mentioned that John Gruden inherited a Superbowl team, and turned it into a perennial loser?

Pick Saints

Bills at Steelers: The Steelers offense looked super charged against Cleveland, but that may not mean much. Super "Big" Ben or no, the Steelers have a good enough defense to put the clamps on an anemic Dick Juron style offense. Although the Bills played ok defense, they are still a few vertebrae short of a solid team.

Pick Steelers

Falcons at Jaguars: This Jags could easily go either way. Something tells me that the Jaguars are going to be plenty pissed after getting run on so badly against the Titans. Jags are better than their week one showing and should eat the Falcons run game alive with no fear of repercussions from Joey Harrington. One other question that needs answering: "Where in the world is Jones Drew Maurice?" The Titans need Jones Drew, and so do the rest of us because it's such a fun name to say.

Pcik Jags

49er's at Rams: St. Louis didn't look very good in their opener against the Panthers, but this is still an offense brimming with talent. As for the 49er's their defense looked really good, but Alex Smith still looks way too green for that offense to progress too much. Look for Stephen Jackson and the Rams too be just a scotch too much for the 49er's. I'd like to see the Rams play this season, I haven't seen much of them after a lengthy boycott for fear of seeing Kurt Warners ugly wife on television.

Pick Rams

Vikings at Lions: Detroit is 1-0 but they surrendered way too ways yards and points to a hapless Raiders team in week one. The vikings play really solid D, and should have very little trouble besting a defenseless Lions team. They can add as many defenders with nicknames as they want, but "Boss" Baily and the Lions still couldn't hold water.

Pick Vikings

Seahawks at Cardinals: The Seahawks are one of the NFC's best teams, and should crush this Cardinals team. Arizona did their usually collapse, and their passing game looked pretty bad doing it. The Cardinals are who we thought they were (couldn't resist).

Pick Seahawks

Cowboys at Dolphins: So much for Wade Phillips bringing a staunch 3-4 D to big D, however Tony romo more than made up for the defensive blunders. Trent Green and the Dolphins should make lots of strides this year but facing a true contender this week won't go in their favor. Trent Green could have a good game against the Dallas secondary, especially Roy Williams. When they say Roy williams is like an extra linebacker they mean that he is way too slow to be at the safety position.

Pick Cowboys

Chiefs at Bears: So much for the K.C. school of "hard knocks" The Chiefs looked woeful and already miss Trent Green. Without the threat of a passing game, K.C will really feel the brunt of Chicago's awesome front seven.

Pick Bears

Jets at Ravens: This game bothers me quite a bit. I certainly like the Ravens D against the Jets back-up QB, but if Kyle Boller starts for Baltimore it may be a wash. The Jet are far more talented than they looked against Patriots, and could take advantage over the middle with their bigger WR. The Ravens will really have to get their run game going, and be patient in this one.

Pick Ravens

Raiders at Bronco's: I want to save some Raiders jokes for the coming weeks.

Pick Bronco's

Chargers at Patriots: Will Bill Belicheat and the Pats be able to beat an elite team without cheating? The Patriot look incredible this year, but maybe they wont if they don't already know the other teams plays are. All in all I still think NE is the class of the league, even if they are now on the up and up.

Pick Patriots

Redskins at Eagles: Washington won their first game, and they certainly have talent. The Eagles lost, and looked sloppy doing it, but this is a team that should contend for the East crown.

Pick Eagles

Lets cut the B.S guys!!!

I'm getting just a little tired of hearing about how gross Britney Spears looked at her most recent performance. Does she look as good as she used to. Of course not. Is she living up to super-star standards? Certainly not. My problem is listening to every fat hairy jack ass with a mouth telling me how repulsive she looks, when the fact of the matter is that if this chick walked into a bar and ordered a beer there would be a line about mile long to buy her a drink.....I'm sure she'd take all of them too....the drinks. It's one thing to say that Britney isn't as hot as she used to be, but its just plain intolerable to listen to a bunch of fat bloated knuckle draggers tell me how gross she is. Face it boys, she isn't a pin up anymore, but Spears is still super-dooable.

Week 1 in the NFL

The Patriots, the Colts, and everybody else. Gone are the days when we would talk about "parody" running rampant throughout the NFL. Salary caps and free agents have not yielded a competitive balance in the NFL, but rather a new age similar to the days when San Fran and Dallas were heads and tails above the rest of the league every year. The Patriots and Colts are absolutely the class of the NFL. This entire NFL season will be a waiting game for the playoff clash between them. The Colts demolished the Saints on Thursdays night, a team that appeared in last years NFC title game, and boasted the leagues #1 ranked offense last year. The Patriots dismantled their chief AFC East rival, and only competition, the Jets. Tom Brady enjoyed the most ridiculous pass-protection I have ever seen in my life. Brady enjoyed five or six seconds!! at times, so relaxed and un-touchable that he didn't even have to move his feet.

The Cardinals showed their true colors and blew another victory on Monday night. Leading 17-13 Arizona pinned the 49er's deep in their own territory. The 49er's had done less than nothing the entire game, and surely were done for. Not so fast! Arizona did their usual prime-time magic, and completely folded. blowing coverages, getting penalties, and blowing a potential game ending fumble recovery opportunity. The sad part of the whole situation was that there was really never any doubt. As soon the Cardinals punted the ball with over a minute left to play, you just knew that Arizona would find a way to lose. It was just a question of how or why. It's all the same, only the names have changed.

The Chargers won a home game against the NFC champion Bears, overcoming a stifling defense. The Chargers unleashed a great pass-rush of their own, and kept Chicago from doing anything at all on offense. Lovie Smith has to be concerned about his offenses total lack of productivity. The Bears also lost safety Mike Brown for the season. Browns regular season appearances are getting shorter and shorter, as are his ligaments.

The Buffalo Bills also gave away an easy win, leading nearly the entire fourth quarter. Buffalo seemed paralyzed down the stretch....too soon? The good news for Buffalo is that a very young defense, and rookie RB showed real promise. It's no surprise that Denver stole a game on the road, the Broncos are very solid especially if Jay Cutler continues to improve.

The Dallas Cowboys have been a source of much off-season discussion, and they won their game over the Giants. Sadly for Dallas they defeated a team that probably wont get that close to winning another game this season. The Giants certainly won't find themselves in another shoot-out with that big fat ass excuse for a quarterback. This Jarred sure isn't on the subway diet.

The disappointment of the week!! Shame on the Jacksonville Jaguars. This squad was supposed to challenge Indy for the division title this year, but instead they seem destined to always be a group of underachievers masquerading as overachievers. The time has come to realise that Jack Delrios squad of rouge misfit's is actually a pretty talented football team, far too talented to lose a home game against the young titans. Not to take any credit away from Jeff Fisher and his team, but there is no way the Jags should allow that Manny rushing yards against them in a home opener. Stroud and Henderson anchor what should be the NFL's best run defense and have no business allowing that many yards to the Titans. Worse yet the Jag's failed to find their own rushing attack, making the much heralded Jones Drew Maurice a giant week one disappointment.


The Redskins beat Miami in overtime.....I still don't care.

Another wagging finger of shame goes to St. Louis who got blown out by Carolina at home. It's not that I'm surprised the Panthers won a road game, they are a very solid football team, but holding St. Louis to 13 is a real head scratch er. The Rams have FAR too much talent to only score 13 points on a Panthers D with weaknesses. I know it's only week one but there has to be a coaching problem. Bulger, Jackson, Bruce, Holt, and McMichael.....13??? at home?

The biggest surprise of the week comes from Houston, where the Texans clobbered the Chiefs. Herm Edwards should have known how much the team would miss Trent Green. Green has engineered a top ten offense for years, without the aid of even a reasonable number one receiver. My hats off to the Texans for finally utilizing the abilities of WR Andre Johnson, I look forward to seeing the progression of this franchise.

The Steelers lambasted the Cleveland Browns 34-7, and it seems that "Big" Ben is ready for redemption. I am a little disappointed that Cleveland had such a poor showing, I really thought that Romeo Crenel had this tram pointed in the right direction. I am very puzzled by Charlie Fry getting traded just days after his start against the steelers. How could you enter the regular season convinced that Fry was your best option, and then deal him after only one start?

The Packers beat Philadelphia in what can only be described as a slop festival. These two teams took turns trying to give the game away, but the Eagles finally prevailed with their second inexplicable muffed punt. The Eagles were a playoff team a year ago, so I can't imagine why they looked so horrible against a lack luster Packers team.

The Seahawks crushed Tampa 20-6. More important than the game was the injury to Buc's QB Jeff Garcia. Any lengthy injury to Garcia will curb the Buc's chances of being competitive this year. Does it seem as though the more John Gruden puts his stamp on this team the worse they get?

The Detroit Lions had their bye week, and defeated the Raiders 36-21.

Labor day weekend!! I could explode

Man alive, I will take any excuse to eat and drink like a pig. "It is labor day weekend after all." Why wouldn't you eat and drink enough for six normal human beings. After all it is the celebration of....labor? I wouldn't have eaten that second tray of nacho's but as a very funny cvomedian once said of holiday splurges: "I think the founding would have wanted it this way." Eat, drink and be merry fellow U.S Americans, such as. The holidays were meant to be spent around loved ones, spluging, laughing, and beng extrodinarily silly. Bust ass the rest of the year, but take full advantage of those guilt free moments, because they are far too rare, far too rare indeed. Getting a chance to be around the ones who you truly care about, and cut loose is too great not to indulge in.

Guitar hero II on 360 is INSANE!!!

I was very skeptical of tis game for a very long time, Guitar hero is what I would categorise as a party game. Not necessarily a ton of fun, unless your getting bombed with friends. I was wrong. Dead wrong. The first time you play "Surrender" by cheap trick....it's over. So over. "Message in a bottle" by the police, need I say more? There are so many cool rock songs, that you know and love, and maybe have even forgotten. Better yet, if you don't play the song correctly, you can't really hear it. In all fairness I was playing the gamer on an insane plasma TV, with great surround sound set-up, but this game should stand up on any reasonable setting. The replay value is astounding, leaving you chomping at the bit for more and more songs, and unlockables. Guitar hero III comes out in October, and you had better believe that this rock n' roll loving hombre will be first in line!!!

3 stars!

Pats Giants pre-season final

I attended last nights pre-season finale at Gillette stadium last night and I can safely say two things: 1) Giants fans embrace the possibilities of next year, 2) Patriots need to keep Tom Brady in a glass booth unless absolutely necessary.

It wasn't all bad for N.Y Eli Manning was reasonably sharp finding his tight end Shockey four times on their opening drive. The run game was reasonably effective with Jacobs having a pretty good average, but Giants football was lack luster, and almost completely without imagination. I don't know if this was a product this being the fourth and final pre-season game of the year and not wanting to tip their playbook too much, or if it was typical Giants football. I can say this with certainty, it took N.Y five tries from the one yard line to score a TD against second sting Patriots. The Giants also got far, far too many penalties (exhibition or not). Depth wise it doesn't look very Rosy for the G-men where back-up quarterback Jared Lorenze was anything but special. The hugely fat QB was sacked seven times, and ate two peantbutter sandwiches. Lorenzen seems to barely be able to get out of his way much less lead an offense. When Lorenzen first took the field I thought he was a guard or a tackle, and the Giants were up to some trickery. Instead of a trick play, Fat Albert simply became acquainted with the turf at Gillette stadium....over and over again.

As for the Patriots it is a bright dawn upon 07. New England, as usual, displayed great depth at every position as well as rock solid play. I am convinced that the Pats second string unit could easily have handed the starting Giants team a loss in sixty minutes of football. Particularly impressive was WR C.J Jones (#2). Jones is more than likely on the bubble with a glut of receivers in New England, but he certainly made a case for himself. Plucking errant passes out of the air, and making positive plays from nothing, Jones will surely impress the coaching staff. Knowing what type of coach Belichek is, he will have been very satisfied from the level of effort from Jones. It's all great for the Pats, I did get the feeling that behind Tom Brady....there isn't much. Matt Cassel was admirable making fair throws, but mostly just benefiting from the best schemes and coaching in the NFL. No one knows how to get receivers and backs in space like the Patriots do. Behind cassel is the sixty seven year old Vinney Testaverde. Vinney T did his best, but is clearly past prime. When I say past prime, I mean his kids are probably past their primes. So long as the Pats keep Brady VERY well protected, this is a deep and talented Patriot roster.

GILLETTE STADIUM: This is one spectacular arena!! I have been to many, many NFL venues in my day but the new Gillette stadium is truly a site to behold. A beautiful tower can be seen from far away. The tower holds a giants circular monitopr which blast red, white and blue images of the Pats and their colors running up and down this enormous cylinder. If that isn't Patriotic enough a slew of revolutionary war soldiers fire a plethora of gun blasts into air, every time the Pats score a TD. There is a Sam Adams brew house!!! Need I say more? Imagine getting a good beer at reasonable prices at a football game? That time has come my friends, it has come indeed. The refreshments are also among the best I have ever consumed at a game of any kind. I got an order of chili cheese fries which was served in an enormous, and sturdy, bowl. The fries cost $6.75 and really wasn't a bad price at all considering the quantity given, and the nice bowl which made consumption so much easier. The stadium is also very open, and convenient. although my seat was pretty high up there was restrooms, and vendors located almost directly off of the stair well. The smoking area was also so close to the seats, that I could still see the field!! It is also worth mentioning that no one immediately dropped dead of lung cancer in this huge OPEN AIR arena. Overall the Patriots home is one beautiful, and convenient venue. I would see a game there anytime.

Where are you marketing people?

Hey where are all the market ring people out there? It has been a long time since I have been able to whore myself out for some free merchandise or tickets. I hate going this long without selling my opinion, and my good name. Get with it people! I'm for sale, and I'm cheap as hell.

A little heavy lately? Not to worry faithful, not to worry indeed.

OK fans I have been a little heavy lately with my poetic side, but don't worry about that. I have emerged from my man cocoon of Booze sorrow with a new found vigor for all things manly!! I should also add that Bulleit is a spectacular bourbon, and is solely responsible for any misspelling this evening. Bring on the NFL, babes, gadgets, and maps. That's right laddies and gentlemen I am going to do my part to help a map poor America get maps. I personally believe that many US Americans cannot locate America on a map, because many Americans in our nation do not have maps. All of the map hoarding rich out there hear this! The poor in our nation such as. Will acquire maps and education from nations such as South Africa, and Iraq such as. So get ready historians, America is about to educated from Iraq, such as.

I am also attending tomorrow nights pre-season NFL game between the Patriots and the New York football Giants. So I will most certainly report to you upon the state of these teams as they prepare to enter the regular season. Depth will be the biggest issue in the last exhibition, especially since Brady and other starters will only see a few snaps. I'd be surprised if Brady wasn't enclosed in a "pope mobile" type of apparatus for the game. Few players are as valuable to their teams as Tom Brady is to the Patriots.

Corrections? I think not!!

A reader recently tried to tell me that the man picture in my umbrella piece was not Gene Kelly, but was infact Fred Astaire. I was perfectly wiling to make this correction to my hilarious article, but upon further research it turns out that I was 100% correct. Fred Astaire never apeared in the film "Singing in the rain." The actor in question is Grace Kelley the films star.

Despite this ill-fated attempt to prove me wrong I heartily encourage all of my faithful readers to attempt to point out any mis-information I could be guilty of.

Nice try smarty pants, maybe next time!

Nothing says homo like an umbrella

Look at this pitiful bastard (above). I'm sorry guys but nothing screams FAG like the use of an umbrella. If your a man, and your not in a VERY expensive suit don't do it. I implore you not to use an umbrella. "I'm so afraid of a few rain drops, thats how gay I am."---Thats what every guy you pass is thinking about a man with an umbrella. Think about it boys, if Grace Kelly looks stupid with one....you most certainly do.

Ever get jilted and regret your actions?

Have you ever really been in love with someone, and it didn't work out? You gave it your all, and fought tooth and nail for your relationship survival. It doesn't happen very often, in fact being in love is a feet far too rare in this day and age. People get used up and spit out so furiously that you don't even remember whose bra is whoso half the time. On those rare occasions that you find yourself getting separated from someone truly special to you, those times are unforgettable aren't they. Perhaps made even more special by that rarity of connection in our busy modern world of wham bam thank you mam. Have you ever acted truly foolish after being jilted by someone you loved? Have you ever cared about someone so much that you disregarded your most core need of being cool, independent, coy, and nonchalant. You acted desperate, pitiful, and....maybe felt a little disgraced afterwards. You regret your actions, your phone calls, you wish you had been cool about it. It makes you mad that you gave the other person all of the power, and let them know that you are destroyed. You feel embarrassed, dis empowered, weak, and sad.

I have recently found myself in these shoes. After a long relationship with someone I loved, I was dumped and acted like the before mentioned jack-ass. In a full blown panic, I left behind my resilient care-free attitude and sullied my good reputation with a series of terribly regrettable actions....but do I really regret them? I was mad, upset, sad, devastated, and back to the beginning again. Even though the ego in me wants to dam myself to hell for acting so weak in this time, another part of me is glad I did it. Being intimately connected to another human is something that just doen't happen enough. That range of emotion and feeling just isn't soemthing to wish away, It's how you know your truly alive! This is why it's great to be a human being, beacuse you feel and emote. You exerience life through an emotional standpoint, unlike other animals that merely seek to survive. Even though you think that you have hit your lowest possible point, you haven't. You have reached the peak of true humanity. Although, I feel stupid right now and I'm addmitidly on the dramatic side, the truth is I wouldn't change a God dam thing. You have just been in love, and most people don't get to go through that very many times if at all. The next time your breaking up with someone and it's far too easy, you will look back on your so called foolishness, and wish to hell that it was hard like that one.

Don't wish away the hard times. Don't regret your idiotic behaivor. If you get caught up in pure emotion, your one up on most of world, and living life the way it should be lived. All in!

It's the most wonderful time of the year!

I enjoy the summer months as much as the next guy, but when it's time for Autumn to rear it's ugly head there is much to be thankful for. Sure the dog days of summer are nearly over, and there will be no more floating in the swimming pool or rollerblading. However; there will be entertainment! It's about time for those lawn mowing Sundays to turn into every mans man fantasy, of sitting on his duffy for twelve straight hours drinking beer, and eating cheap orange cheese on tortilla chips. What I'm talking about is the return of Americas favorite obsession, the national football league. From that first Thursday night kick-off to the Superbowl a lifetimes worth of fond friends, memories, and pizza boxes. There will be emotional highs and lows, there will battles won and lost. There will graceful acrobatics, and there will devastating brutality. Many wars fought, many beers drunk, and all of these things will happen every single Sunday in the magic that is an NFL Sunday. So prepare yourselves men! Loosen up those index fingers, buy some beer and prepare to be elated by not moving a muscle, a feet that happens far too infrequently.

Enjoy boys! Our time is now.

So funny, it doesn't even need a caption

Funny Muslim pics

Funny Muslim pictures

I hope everyone remembers who's who in this picture.

Mail-bag!!!!!

It's once again time for reader E-mails, and it seems the focus is on the upcoming football season and the fantasy football world as we know it.

Jay from Albany: "I like how you focus on running backs in your Fantasy Studs column. I hate it when people talk about QB's too much. Quarterbacks are great but after the first few can't miss guys, or may well not even bother with one until late in your drafts."

Jay, couldn't agree more. There is much more significant drop in talent after the top five or six receivers and tight ends than there is for QB's. If you can't draft a Peyton Manning, or a Drew Brees than the next level has many, many players that will fill your needs at the same level. After the top crop of QB's there is Matt Hasselbeck, and arc Bulger and whole host of pretty Good QB's that will perform adequately. However; if you wait on receiver and fail to get a Steve Smith or a Chad Johnson, the next group of wide-outs are significantly less productive. Plexico Burris, and Bernard Berrian are much less like to help your fantasy team. I strongly recommend that is you get caught without a stud QB, just hold off and make sure you can get a quality WR or TE.

Pete from Mass: "How can you not mention Vikings rookie Adrian Peterson as a potential fantasy stud?

Pete, You hit the nail on the head, when you said "potential." While Adrian Peterson has a world of talent, and has looked phenomenal in pre-season, I have seen far too many rookie runners fall flat in year one. Chester Taylor will likely take a fair share of the Vikings carries, especially on gaol-line which as you know is key in fantasy. If you have a high round pick, wait on Peterson, and take a sure thing first.

Brian from Cohoes, N.Y: "What do you think of fantasy defenses? Seems like a difficult crop this year."

Brian, it is indeed a tough pickins for DST's. I would rank the top group as follows: 1-Bears (can't under-value a DST with Devin Hester) 2-Baltimore 3-New England 4-Sandiego (lots of sacks) 5-Steelers (look for Pitt to be prominent again) 6-Dallas 7-Panthers After that it's anyone guess, draft Bills or Raiders and play match-up every week.

That's all of your post-worthy commentary for now dear readers, as I have been a bit lazy with the blogging as of late. But I promise you much new content in the coming months.

Madden 08 an improvement.....in most ways

The always much anticipated release of Madden football finally came, and much to my surprise there was an apprecable increase in game-play quality. Much to my sha-grin there was absolutely to improvemnt graphically, possibly a step-backwards. Madden has much to learn from 2K sports about smooth animation, especially regarding post-play behavior.

Game-play: It seems like the franchise has taken a positive step towards realism. Although the game proudly boasts a sticker that says "#1 selling pro-football franchise," this is amusing because Madden claimed an exclusive NFL players association license, and thus has no competition. This is frustrating to me, becasue the 2K franchise was a much better football engine. At any rate, the game play has improved for Madden. It seems as though the annoying endless scads of 80 plus yard touchdown plays, have been toned down significantly. Defenses are more realistically alert, and you have an impressive amount of pre-snap adjustments you can make at the line of scrimmage to help defend against a teams strengths. Marquee players are also defined by their strengths, and have special abilities. A brick-wall defender for instance, is less-likely to have a runner break his tackle, or get away from his grasp. A smart safety can read plays from his position, and possibly figure out a passing play before the snap. These new features make MAdden a much more active football game, and make it a lot harder to go into cruise control. Offensively the game is also more intruiging, with the same types of player attribute matchups, and counter adjustments. The franchise mode is a deep and engrossing venture into NFL football. I reqally like to practice modes, and the chance to improve players attributes for the season.

Graphics: I can't say anything good about Madden 08 graphically. There is no improvement of any kind over last years Madden, and maybe even a step backwards. Players faces do not look good, coaches look horrible. Players on the sidelines look ridiculous. The players are ridgid, with far too many straight lines, and not enough smoothness. From a polished look stand-point the Madden 08 engine is nowhere near where 2K sports was before they were blocked from being able to compete. The worst part about Madden is the players between plays. After making a tackle, players jog occwardly back to the huddle. They do not adjust their pads, or walk, or gab realistically. They look like something from a football game that was out five years ago. I now know why there haven't been manny Madden commercials this year showing gameplay, because EA sports is (and should be) ashamed of the way this game looks.

Synopsis: Three stars. The feel is teriffic, you will have a great time. The looks: You will be severly underwhelmed. I beg of the NFLPA and EA sports, please give the license to 2K sports again. There is nothing like healthy competition, have the guts to be the best, by being the best, not by being the only game in town.

Stephon Marbury could be the dumbest man alive

NBA player Stephon Marbury regailed reporters today with his highly educated, intellegent view of the Michael Vick situation. Marbury said: "From what I understand about dog-fighting, it's a sport. It just happens behind closed doors." What a revelation!! Crack coccaine is also a recreational drug, it just happens to be illegal. Lets follow this string of loggic a little further shall we. Rape is just sex, except that it's non-concensual, and against the law.

Stephon went on to say that "It's terrible how we build up Vick, and then tear him down." It is tragic, when will this society stop this practice. The media did the same thing to Charles Manson, and Adolph Hitler. We just love to catch famous people commiting unspeakable atroscities against humanity, and then we pounce all over them. For the love of God! why does this country insist upon crucifying people that par-take in illegal acts of animal cruelty? So Michael Vick fough dogs, slammed a few into walls, and electrocute them. Why should we use this kind of behavior as an excuse to "tear him down."

In all seriousness, Get a fu$%ing grip Stephon!!!!!!!!!!!! You are one out of touch, highly retarded, ideodic, piece of human trash. You and your cheap sneakers can take a long walk off of a short pier. Marbury now ranks amoung the bumbest people on earth, possibly the dumbest. His comments are ceratinly the dumbest I have heard in a great long time.

JanSport "Big student pack" is awsome!!

I just received a new JanSport big student pack, and it certainly lives up to it's billing. Available in 14 different colors and patterns, the bag is more eye appealing than your run of the mill nap-sack. The Big Student is also sturdy, with particularly strong straps that will hold up to the punishment of anything you can cram into your bag. As a student I can attest there is nothing more annoying than a bag whose straps are so strained from carrying books around that it seems the straps will completely tear away from the bag itself. This will not happen with the Big student, and it would be a challenge just to fill this curiously large back-pack. The bag is designed to make excellent use of an extra zipper pouch, maximizing load capacity, while minimizing overall size. Keeping this a true back-pack, suitable for either work or play.

Don't forget to enter the Big Student Fall-break sweepstakes. A chance to win this great pack, and an all inclusive trip for four to the grand-canyon. Log onto: http://www.jansport.com/bigstudent , then click the Facebook logo and log in or sign up for Facebook and join the JanSport: Go Big group —it's that simple!



For more information on the Big student pack, please visit: http://www.jansport.com/js_tbsp_landing.php

JanSport press release

PRESS RELEASE

Enter to Win The Big Student Fall Break Sweepstakes

SAN LEANDRO , CALIF. (July 23, 2007) – Meet the Big Student: A pack designed to fit your style and all your stuff, with more colors, more patterns and more capacity. What more could your backpack ask for? The JanSport ® Big Student is available in 14 different colors and patterns as individual as you and wins technical points for its two large main compartments for versatile storage, front utility pocket with audio electronics organizer and a quick -find cell phone pocket.

JanSport is giving everyone a chance to win this pack and a much needed Fall Break trip with their Big Student Fall Break Sweepstakes . Grand prize is a trip for 4 to the Grand Canyon , including flight, lodging, entrance fees, ground transportation and meal costs. Runners up can bag a prize too with JanSport's Big Student Pack Giveaway —giving away one Big Student pack a day through September 19th.

Now, how to enter: JanSport has partnered with Facebook.com to launch their Big Student Pack. To find out more about this awesome pack and enter to win the Big Student Fall Break Sweepstakes, log onto www.jansport.com/ bigstudent , then click the Facebook logo and log in or sign up for Facebook and join the JanSport: Go Big group —it's that simple!

About JanSport

Founded in 1967 JanSport ® , a division of VF Outdoor Inc., is headquartered in San Leandro , California , and is a leading manufacturer and global marketer of backpacks, travel bags and accessories. The Company offers products for school, business, travel and all outdoor adventures. JanSport ® products are sold in a variety of retail stores throughout the world. To find additional information, log onto www.jansport.com.

About the Company
VF Corporation is a leader in branded lifestyle apparel including jeanswear, outdoor products, image apparel and sportswear. Its principal brands include Wrangler , Lee , Riders , Rustler, The North Face, Vans, Reef, Napapijri, Kipling, Nautica , John Varvatos , JanSport , Eastpak , Eagle Creek , Lee Sport , Majestic and Red Kap .

Sooooo ready for the 2007 NFL football season!!

I guess it's time for me to tell you all how things are going to shake out this year and why. Don't forget to bookmark this site, because at years end you will be amazed at how close my pre-season prediction come to the actualy outcome.

AFC East:

1)New England Patriots: Was there really any doubt? The rich get richer, as the Pats add some quality help at wide-out. Randy Moss, onte Stallworth, and Wes Welker give the Patriots more than enough fire-power to keep defenders away from the line of scrimmage and all of things they love to do with star running back Laurence Marouney. This gives the best QB in the game, Tom Brady, a lot to work with. Good news for the rest of the league, stud quarterbacks should be in grand supply as long as Brady is intent on scattering his DNA across theis vast country of ours. The question remaining is weather or not an aging defense has been ignored too much this off-season.

2) New York Jets: Don't be surprised to see the Jets give the Patriots a run for their money in the East thiss year. Pennington orchestrates a tremendous passing attack with Coles, and Cotchery. The addition of Thomas Jones at running back should add stability and a sound running game, as opposed to last years everybody try one or two running plays a quarter and see if anybody does anything good policy. Jets defense lacked adeqaute pass coverage, but a revamped secondary should improve that. Pass defense always takes time to gel, so don't expect New York to turn around too dramatically in one season, although a wild-card spot is not out of the question here.

3) Miami Dolphins: This is the difficult call, in the division. Miami and Buffalo could easily flip-flop here at 3 and 4, but for now I have to with
Miami. Adding Trent Green was a superb move, and Ronnie Brown is going to be a very good runner. If the Dolphins can pass block a little bit the also have a couple of pretty darn good receivers in Chris Chambers and Marty Booker. The only problem is they let tight-end Randy McMichael leave to St. Louis. McMichael is a very good pass-catching tight-end and Trent Green loves his tight-ends. On defense the Fish are always fairly sound, and that should improve even further under Dom Cappers direction.

4)Buffalo Bills: Letting Willis McGahee go was more than a bit puzzling, and I don't even think Buffalo got enough for him. Dick Juron isn't what I would consider an A-list coach, and by not A-list I mean he sucks. However; his players always seem to love him, so given enough talent, I'm sure he can provide some competitive football. Lossman is coming around, and has a couple of pretty fair WR's but its really up to Anthony Thomas and the running game. If the A-train can muster enough of a running game to keep the dogs oof of Lossman, the Bills will be competitive. Buffalo has a very talented young secondary, but a lack of leadership and experiance at the linebacker position will hamper the unit and intensify their growing pains, especially early in the season. Other than that...I guess there is an applebee's.

AFC NORTH

1) Pittsburgh Steelers: "Big" Ben Rothelisburger, and "Fast" Willie Parker have both cool nicknames and talent. I expect the Steeler offense to improve dramatically this season with Rothlisberger not suffering severe head trauma prior to the season. Parker is a very underrated RB, and he can used out of the backfield as well. Lets not forget about the Pittsburgh rock, Hines Ward. Steelers D won't be dominating, but they they do have enough playmakers to win a lot of football games.

2) Baltimore Ravens: Old school footbal is always in-vougue in the NFL, and few aer going to do it better than B-more this season. A punishing defense with stagerring pass rushers, and playmakes in the secondary make Ravens defense very stout. Baltimore can also pursue the run game of their glory days (day) with Willis Mcgahee at running back. McNair can still lead an offense, and make plays, but how long he can last as the starter remains to be seen. If McNair stays healthy and the Ravens can run-block and work play-action with, also oft injurred TE Todd Heap, than the Ravens will be a force to be dealt with. Also don't miss the Ray Lewis, O.J Simpson charity stabbing competition on Sept 12.

3) Cincinnati Bengals: I know, I know, I can hear you all now; "Bull crap, Carson Palmer and ocho Stinko, blah blah blah...." Let me tell you something friends. The game of football has changed in many, many ways but one thing has never changed. If you can't stop anybody, you can't beat anybody. Not only does Cincinnati have a lousy crap defense, but they haven't even attempted to adressee it, at least not in recent memory.

4) Cleveland Browns: Romeo Crenel has this franchise pointed in the right direction, I just hope they give him enough time to finish the job. Rock solid receiving core. Braylon Edwrads provides the big play, while Joe Jerivicus is the posession receiver. It still remains to be seen, wheather or not Super Dave will be a good TE or not, maybe well get the answers to that this season. In the end Cleveland has the most problems in the trenches, I still think Charlie Fry could be a very good QB if given enough protection.

AFC SOUTH

1) Jacksonville Jaguars: Old school football at it's finest. Fred Taylor and Jones Drew Maurice provide a sensational rushing attack, and Byron "Fat Albert" Leftwhich an be as effective as anyone with enough support. Defensively the Jags have a virtuaslly impenitrable run defense with Stroud and Henderson in the middle of the D-line. They also have a shut down corner, and one of the most underrated players in the game today in Rashean Mathis.

2) Indianapolis Colts: The offense is as poweful as ever, but you can't lose players on defense when you have zero depth to begin with. Look for the same-old Colts this year, to lose a lot of high scoring games.

3) Tenneesse Titans: Jeff Fisher is definately one of the most under-rated coaches in the game of football today. He consistently has the Titans competing, and playing hard late into the season despite a serious talent defeciency.The Titans have been mired in salary cap hell since their superbowl run. Even though Vince Young looks great as a young quarterback, the Titans are still a ways away from playoff contention. I just hope Fisher gets a chance to still be the coach when they turn the corner.

4) Houston Texans: I don't care who the QB is, if Houton can't protect him he won't be successful. I really feel like the Texans made a mistake with David Carr, if he hadn't been sacked two billion times he would have been very successful in Houston. As it is the Texans have far too many holes to fill, to be bringing in veteran quarterbacks.

AFC WEST

1) Sandiego Chagers: There is a lot to worry about when facing the Chargers. Tomlinson, Gates, and Rivers are as talented as any offensive tri in the game today. Chargers also benefit from a phenominal o-line and a great pass-rush. In the defensive secondary Quinten Jammer is a very underrated corner, and could be poised for a break-out year. Jammer also plays in the AFC West where there aren't a tremendous amount of good WR's to face.

2) Denevr Bronco's: Denver will push Sandiego for the top spot in the west. Javon Walker is a very good threat at wide-out, and Travis Henrey can still be a stud runner, especially in Denver where Broncos are consistently the best run blocking team in the NFL. Rookie quarterback Jay Cutler will have his share of growing pains, and in the end that will be the difference between play-offs and not. Denver always plays solid defense, do I relly have to mention Champ Baily? I didn't think so.

3) Kansas city Chiefs: It seems Larry Johnson is about reay to re-join his mates in K.C and it's a good thing because there isn't much there. An aging Chiefs offense features Tony Gonzalez, and Edddie Kennison. These players are fine, and I love Gonzo as much as the next guy buy they are most definately on the downsides of their career. You can have an offense with veterans skill players like that, but only if you are featuring a smart veteran quarterback.....like Trent Green for instance. In his absence I just don't see how this K.C offense will work at all, it's a complex scheme that works but a rookie QB is going to need better WR's than the Cheifs have. Defensively the Cheifs upgraded several positions, but they still look far too vulnerable against the run, they have a ways to go.

4)Oakland Raiders: You have to give Rex Ryan and his defense some accolades for last season. Raiders d performed exceptionally well, especially considering the fact that they were well out of contention early in the season. Oaklands run defense will sorely miss big Ted Washington in the middle, but they have a lot of young talent at linebacker. Offensivley this is another team like Houston and Cleveland that needed an up-grade on the o-line sorely. Wheathers it's culpepper, Russel, or McCown they will have a tough time throwing the football behind that swiss cheese line.

NFC EAST

1) Dallas Cowboys: This is a pick that I trust the least. Dallas certainly has a very talented young football team, without glarring weakness. However; Wade Phillips is just plain dumb. Dallas had a chance to land a good young coach, but insisted they needed a coach with experiance. What good is experiance, when it comes with a lot of getting fired and loseing big games? Dallas is picked first becasue I love Tony Romo, Owens, Jones, Glenn, and Witten. But I wouldn't be all that surprised to see the Boys get out-coached in a few key games and let Philly win this division again. Defensively Dallas should be very sound despite short comings in coverage. Phillips is good at masking that with a nice pass-rush, and he has the tols to do that here.

2) Philadelphia Eagles: With a very solid offensive line, Brian Westbrook and one of my favrite young tight ends in L.J Smith, the Eagles will be just fine. If Greg Lewis can emerge into a consistent speed threat McNabb will be a happy camper. Brian Dawkins still anchors a tough Philly defense, but this unit will show signs of wear and tear this year. Kurse and McDougle could be an imposeing pair of pass-rushers, if they are the players they were before serious injurry.

3) Washington Redskins: On paper this is a team that should challenge Dallas, but the skins always look good on paper. Santanna Moss, Clinton Portis, Chris Cooley, Brandon Lloyd, Antwaan Randel El, and a very solid group of veteran offensive lineman. The defense always plays very well under the direction of Gregg Williams. I guess the only real question is did the game pass Joe Gibbs by? If it didn't than this Redskins team is a Lion waiting the bushes.

4) New York Giants: Head coach Lame Duck has his work cut out for him with this re-building franchise. Eli Manning and the passing game will probably make manny teams nervous this year, Manning is poised to take another step forward and he the receiving help to do it. I like Rueben Droughns as a running back, but he certainly can't do all of things that Barber did for N.Y especially in the passing game. Defensively the Giants have manny problems. New York has a very good pass rush, which shows us just how bad that secondary really is. Gianst biggest problmes will be at linebacker. There isn't much in the way of talent here, and opposing teams will shove those pass-rushing ends up field and attack New York right up the gut where they don't have an answer. There are many different ways I could see the NFC East turning out by years end, but all of the scenarious have the G-men in the basement.

NFC NORTH

1) Chicago Bears: I see no reason why the Bears shouldn't once again be annointed the kings of the NFC. I think Dennis Green said it best; "You wanna crown, than cron their ass." Devestating defense, especially when a healthy Tomas Harris can cause havic in the middle of that D-line, tremendous special teams, and an offense with numerous young weapons. As long as Rex Grossman improves the Bears should have no problem mowing down the North.

2) Minnesota Vikings: The Vikings got the steal of the draft when Peterson fell into thier laps. Peterson will provide the perfect compliment to RB Chester Talyor who does the power game, and wears out defenses. A very talented young Vikings defense should Minnesota in a lot of games, but their inexperianced QB will lose some of them.

3) Detroit Lions: Tatum Bell, and a talented receiving core certainly make the Lions look like an imposeing force, but they still haven't adressed a very average o-line or a spotty defense. Look for John Kitna to have a lot of great efforts in defeat.

4) Green Bay Packers: Is it too soon to start asking about wheather or not Brett Favre will retire next year? Aside from that on going drama there isn't much in the way of good football to talk about concerning the Pack. Al Harris and A.J Hawk are good players, but they won't shine without more help from that D-line. Offensively the Packers will be looking to put all of the load of Favre, without a devent running game to turn to. Normally Favre can make plays with very little talent, but with only Donald Driver to lean on things could get tough. The Packers relly needed to find a good receiving TE this offseason to help Favre, but they faied miserably.


NFC SOUTH

1) New Orleans Saints: Tough call here, but the Saints have too much power for an underachieving Pathers defense. Brees, Bush, and Colston should be able to score enough points to keep their division rivals at bay, but this should be a hotly contested division. The Saints have plenty of holes on defense, but it shouldn't matter much in the South. They will not be a factor in the play-offs.

2) Carolina Panthers: Offensively the Panthers have enough talent to have a good year. Steve Smith must be respected, and Foster can be a very good back (when healthy). The problem for Carolina is a defense that never quite rises to expectations. Despute talent up front and good corners and safties, the Panthers never turn into that dominating force they should be. I hate to say this because I have been a hugh John Fox fan, but perhaps his unit gets out-schemed far too often.

3) Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Thats right folks!! I'm calling for TB to edge out the Falcons. Jeff Garcia will run Gruedens offense to perction, and he has plenty of help. The Bucs have been quietly assembling a nice little offense down there in the Bay. Joey Galloway has really shined since joiing Tampa, and Michael Clayton should emerge into a teriffic posession receiver. Alex Smith is a promising youg TE, and the O-line is slightly revamped. Even if the Buc's line isn't as patched up as it outgh to be, Garcia will help mask that defeciency with his ability to move around and scramble. Tampa will have to most problems of defense but solid leadreship at LB and in the secondary will help this unit continue to be competitive. Next season the Bucs will be the trendy break-out team.

4) Atlanta Falcons: There hasn't been much talk about Atlanta aside from Michael Vick and his propensity for mistreating four legged animals. I am not a huge Vick fan, I don't think he is a very good passer, and often hampers this team. Unfortunately the Falcons signed the only available quarterback who would not be an upgrade in the passing game. Bringing Joey Harrington aboard was not a great move for this club, they should have held onto to Schaub. The erratic Harrinton will be looking to aging WR Joe Horn who is just a shaddow of his former self. Atlanta defense loooks good on paper, but they will not overcome the offenses turnovers, and lack of time of posession.

NFC WEST

1) Seattle Seahawks: This is a rock solid football team, and the only club will legitimately challenge Chicago for the NFC title. A healthy Matt Hasselbeck armed with a tremendous power run game, and a more acclimated Deion Branch will be a force to be dealt with. Seattle defense is un-spectacular but solid, and that all it will take to be a force in the NFC. Rocky Bernard, and Patrick Kerney will help a nice front four, while Marcus Traufant provides the good man coverage. Hawks linebackers aren't the most talented in the league, but they play smart. Seattle rarely gives up the big play.

2) St. Louis Rams: I love what the St. Louis Rams are doing. A pwer run game powered b mac truck Steven Jackson, accompanied by the most under-appreciated QB in the NFL. Marc Bulger is a tremendous passer, he never quite gets his due, but should. The receivers are aging a shade in Tory Holt, and Sir Issac Bruce but with a veteran signal caller, they will beable to best most opponents. I also really like the addition of tight end Randy McMichael. The Rams also boast a defense that could really break out in 07. Leonard Little, and Le'roi Glover should provide a substantial pass rush up-front, and a talented linebacking core should continue to progress. The real problem here is in the secondary where there really aren't any good corners, but Chavious should help at safety.

3) San Francisco 49er's: I know this is the trendy pick to be the new team, I still see the 49er's as a year or two away from serious play-off contention. I certainly see the potential for a threatening offense with Gore, Davis, and Jackson, but Alex Smith will have a difficult year two with mounting pressure for success. The 49er's defense is without recognizeable names, accept for the over-achieving CB Walt Harris. This is a franchise headed in the right direction, but they still need help.

4) Arizona Cardinals: Exactly who I thought they were. They suck.

Movies you should rent

I recently had an opportunity to watch Idiocracy, a little known movie that didn't even make it to the big screen. Written and produced by Mike Judge, Idiocracy offers some of the funniest moments in recent movie memory. Luke Wilson stars as Joe Baurs, an army man who is chosen for a special military experiment. Baurs is frozen and wakes up 500 years into the future. Joe quickly discovers than man-kind has grown progressively dumber, and that he is now the smartest man alive. Humans have been reduced to crude physical comedy, and sexual impulses. you can imagine how the jokes unfold, and there is a heavy supply of very, very funny moments. If you haven't had an opportunity to see this movie, you owe it to yourself to try it. Idiocracy is hilarious!

Also well worth watching is the thriller "Breach" Breach is abut the greatest security threat in the history of the United States. It is based an actual events, and is a taught thriller, filled with thought provoking events, and impeccable acting. Chris Cooper is positively brilliant in this film.

2007 Fantasy football studs! Who the hell are they?

What an odd year it is going to be for fantasy football players. Unlike the last several years, there really isn't a clear-cut top group of running backs to covet going into your draft. Sure, Tomlinson, is certainly numero uno, but after that it gets fuzzy. Larry Johnson is surrounded in contract turmoil making him virtually untouchable (too-eaely in a draft)So who rounds out your top ten? I'm not sure, but I do have some suggestions:

1)Steven Jackson: Jackson was a work-horse for the Rams last year, and there is no reason why he wont be that guy again. Jacksons explosive style of power running also makes him a great candidate to get the rock in the red zone.

2) Thomas Jones: Don't let Jones slip too far in your draft. The Jets boast an awsome passing game with Pennington, Jerricho, and Coles, making it very hard for teams to stack the line of scrimmage. Jones had great seasons with Chicago when opposing defenses never worried about the threat of the pass. He's a great slashing runner, get T.J if you can.

3)Jones Drew Maurice: The Jaguars have found something special in Jones Drew "the human pin-ball" Watching this guy bounce off of defender after defender after defender...it's like watching someone play a Madden video game. Maurice could be the next Earl Cambell, I have rarely seen that type of tackle breaking ability.

4) Willis Mcgahee: Mcgahee on the Ravens is a scary proposition. Willis is definatekly a talented running back, and Baltimore is typically an excellent run-blocking team.

5) "Fast" Willie Parker: Parker had a great fantasy season year with the Steelers, even in a down season, and I see no reason why he wont do even better this year. Parker has the ability to go the distanc on any given carry, and he gets a lot of action in the passing game as well.

6) Naturally Laurence Maroney, Clinton Portis,Reggie Bush and Ruddy Johnson are still top candidates.

7) Also, closely monitor the RB sittuatiion for the Bronco's and the Giants. Both teams starters should be well worth a roster spot, especially Denver who routinely churns out great fantasy Running backs.

The Cheesecake factory, a unique restaurant

A cheesecake facotry finally opened in my area, and after almost a year of ignoring what would seem a typical chain restaurant, I finally dinned there. I have never been so surprised by a national chain restaurant unlike the usual Fridays, Outback, or Caraba's The factory's food and drink are as good as it's young energetic atmosphere. Beauitfully decorated The restaurant offers a very cunning cross between something that screams youth, or class. There is a bar, which you'll become aquainted withg due to the non-stop waiting list, decorated with large flat-screen T.V's. The facory also has a very clever "open line" where the kitchen is seemingly open for view, but convientiently can't really be seen from any table in the house.

I had a mojito which was much to my surprise the best I have had in a very long time. I was fully preppared for the usual chain drink which entails a goldfishbowl the size of your head, and very little taste, but the Factory gave a modest sized cocktail that tasted wonderful. My meal began with an order of "Buffalo blasts" a delightfully decedant treat. Buffalo tyle chicken meat packed inside of a fried wonton. Served with buffalo sauce, and blue cheese. For an entree I choose The fried pork piccata style, served with macaroni and cheese. The pork, pounded untra thin, was fantastic! Topped with a handfull of capers. The Macaroni and cheese was also a great surprise with at least three exotic cheeses flavoring this normally 'back yard' style treat. My dining companion also had an outstanding dinner, in the Jambalaya pasta.

Outstanding food and drinks made this a memorable dining experiance. With a rather large menu to choose from the facory can satisfy nearly every appetite, from hamburgers to sea bass. My sole complaint would be the tables themselves, packed tightly together, I sometimes felt as though I was eating with complete strangers. My complaints are minor, the Cheesecake factory has re-defined what a chain restaurantr can be. I will most certainly be dining there again.

Stanley cup play-offs are almost here!!

while NHL hockey is our second favorite sport here at football and beer, we always acknowledge that Lord Stanley's Cup is the hardest trophey to bring home. Seven game series in each round of the p[layoffs, including god knows how many overtimes, makes hockey the hardest sport to win a championship in. The non-stop night after night, banging, crashing, slashing, punching, and shot blocking fury of playoff hockey is about as adrenaline filled a testosterone ride as there is.....don't miss this. If your not a hockey fan, I implore you to watch opne series of playoff hockey. Any series will do, and you'll never look back. Whethere it's a goal-tender making improbable save after improbable save, under the most harsh of offensive onslaughts or a true goal scorer turning the tides of a scoreless game with first rate stick handling and skating abiliity, the stanley cup playoffs has it all. A defenseman laying it all on the line for his team and blocking a slap shot with velocity near 100mph is not only heroic, it's common place when fighting for a hockey championship.

We will be covering the quest for cup here at football and beer, and I urge newcomers to the sport to watch and enjoy!

Sorry little girl....HE'S GAY, GAY, GAY!!!!

The 50 signs your getting older

1) You still think tattoos are edgey.
2) You still believe that smoking makes someone tough and cool
3) You refer to women as broads
4) You refer to broads as chicks
5) You are still amazed every time you see breakdancing
6) You no-longer like music that has been re-made
7) You find sports like golf, and bowling increasingly intruigeing
8) You refuse to replace your DVD collection with blue-rays
9) You were also the last person to replace his VHS collection with DVD's
10) You are baffled by the I-pod's "wheel."
11) You continually comment on the overabundance of Starbucks
12) You often complain about never seeing 'Star-trek the next generation' re-runs
13) Every time you spot 'Big League Chew' you say "oooh."
14) You still contemplate whether MC Hammer was a great dancer, or was it those magnificent pants?
15) You can't believe you can take pictures with your telephone
16) You get overly excited when you see retro clothing at the mall
17) You still remember Jayne Seymour as "one spicey mamma."
18) You referance 'L.A Law' as the greatest legal drama ever made
19) You frequently immitate the sounds that an old dial up computer connection makes
20) You giggle at your dial-up connection impression
21) You get every SINGLE obscure reference on the 'Family Guy'
22) You insist the writers of 'Family Guy' must be "real cool dudes."
23) You smile every times Randy Jackson says, "dope," and no one laughs at him
24) You eagerly await anoher comedy from that youngster John Cusack
25) You watch 'deal or no deal' to see if Howie Mandell will put a rubber glove on his head
26) You talked about Rocky 6 for weeks before it's release
27) You still compare every great videogame to 'golden-eye'
28) You talk about that one great snow storm that was like no other
29) You know who played in Super bowl I
30) You love humerous bumper-stickers
31) You can't figure out how to scilence the messagging noises on your IM
32) You mute your entire PC to over IM noises
33) Somewhere in your basement you own 'Jarts' thye lawn darts game
34) Every summer you bum rush the 'slip n' slide' trying desperately to emulate that dam commercial
35) The only way you are exposed to modern music is by watching 'American Idol'
36) You still plan to eventually conquer the 'Rubix Cube'
37) You DVR the A-team every chance ytou get
38) Every time you watch the late show you wonder what ever happened to Connans side kick? You know, that guy that was actually funny
39) You know all of the 'Golden Girls' names. First and last
40) Every comedian you ever liked now hosts a game-show. You also notice that Jeff Foxworthy hosts a game show
41) every time another Jurassic park comes out you say: "It's about time."
42) You think fast zombies are an obscenity
43) You can't fathom Eddie murphy making family comedies
44) You still wonder how pumping up your sneakers can possibly help
45) You are still laughing about Randy Jackson saying "Dope"
46) You insist that clothing sizes run smaller than they used to
47) You fantascize about napping more than sex
48) In the morning you no longer have the strength to hold off relieving yourself untill after you have made the coffee
49) You count CSI as mental stimulation
50) You once rode the party line, but now say that all politicians are full of crap